The Adventures of Tracy and James! Chapter 4: Television Trap


Zach Lewis

Tracy – the human – and ZoopZoop – the gecko-like creature – run toward the torch emitting a bright green flame. They hear James moaning in the background. 

“It’s just some minotaur pee, he’s such a baby,” Tracy says. 

Beep Beep Beep!” ZoopZoop exclaims. 

“That’s true, this is a new and strange world to him.  The fact of which must be even more terrifying since he is such a baby,” she says as she grabs the torch out from the bronze wall canister. “Oh god, what now?” Tracy asks as the ground beneath the two heroes grumbles. 

Beep!” ZoopZoop exclaims as the cobblestone floor opens and the two heroes slide down and fall into a crystalized glass globe made green from the flame of the torch in her hand. The words, “life is the word after the silence,” are etched into glass in the cylindrical shaped room. 

“Well that’s creepy and cryptic,” she says as she swings the torch back and forth. ZoopZoop is mesmerized. Its eyes swish back and forth like a pendulum, hypnotized by the glow. A thick silence descends upon the place. The globe begins to expand and soon there are no ceilings to be seen. Walls appear to have ceased their existence. The ground is now marble floors. The manufactured remains of a million sculptures stretching out toward the horizon. A slight curvature appearing where the quiet air mixes with the glossy ground. Nothing but a silver-tinted atmosphere and floor. Tracy ponders that she must be in a building of some sort but the lack of structure, besides a floor, befuddles the sentient creature that is in the shape of a television. 

“I don’t need to be loud. You need to turn me up,” Television mumbles.  

“Wow, it can talk,” Tracy says as Television’s volume increases, and top node turns slightly clockwise.  

“I’m surprised that you can listen,” Television states clearly as its screen begins to flicker. 

“Well that’s rude, who da hell do you think you are?” Track asks and ZoopZoop beep!

“I’m a television. My friend calls me T.V.” 

“Your friend?” Tracy asks and looks around, “Who’s that?” 

“That’s you!” Television shouts and beams out images of kittens and puppies as its antenna beckons Tracy forward. Tracy is seriously weirded out. 

“I’m seriously weirded out,” Tracy says and brings the torch between he, ZoopZoop and the sentient television. 

“You sound disappointed?” Television asks. 

“No, I’m flabbergasted,” Tracy stares into the silvery light of the void the two heroes now inhabit. 

“Love has that effect on people,” Television squeaks. 


“Nothing… I love you! We’ll all live together here forever,” Television says. 

“Well we’ll see about that. Could be nice living forever in a creepy void with an obsessive appliance. Where is here, by the way?” Tracy asks, noticing a distinct lack of temperature. Not room temperature, but no temperature. 

“This is my place!” Television megaphones outwards. Each syllable filling up the cavernous space of emptiness. Silvery light as far as Tracy and ZoopZoop can see with the only interruption being a now black and white marble floor. 

“I see, very descriptive,” Tracy says as ZoopZoop is still mesmerized by the green flame that, according to Ozburtle, can never be extinguished. “Why is your screen stuck on that image?” Tracy points the torch at the screen. “What’s on your tummy?” 

“Image? Tummy?” Television asks. 

“The canoe on the water,” Tracy states, “and the screen is your tummy, dummy.” 

“That’s my face.” The screen takes on a reddish tint. 

“Your face is a blue canoe on a pond? I guess that’s not the weirdest thing here,” Tracy says. 

Beep!” ZoopZoop says in agreement, its eyes still locked on the flame. 

“Has anyone ever turned those?” Tracy asks as she inspects the two silver dials. 

“Well that’s fresh. First you don’t want to be my friend and now you want to twist my knobs.” As Television is talking, Tracy confirms her suspicion. Television is an idiot. 

 “I’m not an idiot!” Television shouts. 

“You heard my—”    

“Of course, I heard you! You thought it as loud as we’re talking, and yes, I’m telepathic, and no it’s not odd.” 

“A little bit,” Tracy says. 

“No, it isn’t,” Television speaks out of its volume holes. 

A thundering gallop echoes from the horizon. A human shape. It’s Ozburtle. His now metallic blue robes cascades against the bright nothingness that is the room. His reflection ripples out for what appears to be miles on the now clear marble below.  

“Tracy! ZoopZoop! I didn’t know where you were. My sensor magic doesn’t down here,” Ozburtle says and turns around to see the love-struck piece of technology. 

“Get away from that television!” Ozburtle thunders out. An antenna flicks forward and slices Tracy’s cheek. The marble floor underneath T.V. funnels downwards creating an inverted pyramid of empty space. T.V.’s antenna whaps Tracy’s knee cap. 

“Stop that!” Tracy says as she burns the antenna with the green flame. Ozburtle claps his hand and shouts the words ZANDAR TROGOUT MOOOOP! Purple lightning shoots out from his fingers at the television. The screen cracks on the television called Television. 

“You’ll never discover the secret treasure of Kazaduul!” Television screeches. 

“Finish it off, Tracy!” Ozburtle shouts. 

Tracy pulls out a laser pistol and points the gun at Television. “Goodbye lover,” she says as she squeezes the trigger. PEW! PEW! Television’s screen shatters as the canoe sinks and the image drizzles away along with the glass. A gust of air blowing down from a mysterious source near the ceiling forces Television into the inverted pyramid that opened beneath the psychopathic and telepathic electronic. The marble snaps back after Television is swallowed up. No remnants remain of Television. The silver hue of the air disappears, leaving a sharp paleness in its place. 

Beep!” Says ZoopZoop. 

“Right you are ZoopZoop, right you are,” Ozburtle says, and clears his throat. “You two got sucked into a virus. Virus portals pop up along the Interdimensional-galactic highway, normally preying on the elderly, they’re a physical embodiment of what on Earth you might encounter using Internet Explorer or a sketchy message board. You two could have been trapped here with that weirdo forever. Now we’re just one floor below where you two grabbed the green flame.” 

“I know,” Tracy says. “Thanks for your help though.” 

“Oh of course, I thought the boy was with you. Where’s James?” Ozburtle asks. “And, you’re welcome.” 

“He’s varnishing the desk remember, with the vinegar,” she says as she waves the green flame. “What happened with the minotaur?” 

Beep!” ZoopZoop says as its eyes still follow the flame. 

“Good, right, well…” Ozburtle strokes his beard. “Let’s find our way back to the lad and I’ll tell you all about the minotaur and we can really ramp up our search for the secret treasure of Kazaduul.”